Taken

I'd have liked to see this film earlier in my life so I might have enjoyed it more. In aid of universal understanding, Taken is what I imagine 'McBain' from the Simpsons would be like.

Liam Neeson plays Brian, a retired special ops agent who just wants to get along with his ex-wife and  her irritating new husband enough to catch up on the years he missed with his daughter. But when the fruit of his loins runs off to Paris and is kidnapped by slave traders, Brian has to cast off his zimoframe and pump up the 12-gauge to get her back, leaving the loving embrace of the US of A to the dank and evil streets of France to kick some serious Euro ass! 

I stumbled onto this searching for other work from the cast of Lost, in this case Maggie Grace, who plays the (so I guessed) over emotional 4 year old trapped in a 17 year olds' body daughter of Neeson, whos' drunken stumbling through every scene she's in somehow causes him to be endlessly devoted to her. Although the action is at least decent, it just seems to be there for the sake of it, as we never really feel a proper emotional connection between father and daughter, making the murder and torture of near every cliche, unthreatening 'bad guy' (aka everyone who isn't American) seem incredibly unneccesary.

The 'unique set of skills' Brian uses to find his daughter are very unique indeed, in the respect he always knows what he is doing and comes up against no obstacles whatsoever in his search, garnering no sympathy for his plight. This is not helped either by Neeson dancing a knife edge between gritty realism and stone faced and empty styles of acting.

After the apparent 'hell' this adventure contains it is wrapped up far too nicely making the kidnap, slavery and gruesome deaths of many innocent girls seem like one of Jack the Ripper's bedtime storys, glazing over any subject depth to give a 'happy ever after'

If the Bourne Identity made your head hurt, this is just the ticket. A thriller that ticks all the boxes but nothing particularly captivating